A blonde woman walks into a bank in NYC before going on vacation and asks for a $5,000 loan.

The banker asks, "Okay, miss, is there anything you would like to use as collateral?"

The woman says
A young brunette goes into the doctor's office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it.
"Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me."
She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams
A blonde texts her b/f saying that she doesn't understand what IDK means, and wondering if he understood what it meant.

He replied back saying "I don't know"

The blonde immediately texts her b
A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"



In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."



Our bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wr
A blond boarded a plane to Chicago. She was seated in the general passenger section. Once the airplane was in the air, she got up and went into first class and took a seat. The stewardess told her that unless she produced a first class ticket she had to return to the other section. The blonde refused and said I am going to Chicago and I am staying here. Other stewardesses tried everything to get
-she sent me a fax with a stamp on it

-she thought a quarterback was a refund

-she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order

-she thought meow mix was a record for cats

-under "education" on her job application,she put "Hooked On Phonics"

-she tried to drown a fish

-she tripped over a cordless phone

-she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said 'concentrate'

-she pu
Two blondes were walking through the woods and they came to some tracks. The 1st blonde said,"These look like deer tracks,"and the other one said , " No,they look like moose tracks". They argued until the train hit them.
Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door to their Mercedes with a coat hanger. They tried and tried to get the door opened,but they couldn't. The girl with the coat hanger stopped to catch her breath,and her friend said anxiously,"Hurry up! Its starting to rain and the top's down!
A blonde wanted to go ice fishing. She'd seen many books on the subject, and finally, after getting all the necessary "tools" together, she made for the nearest frozen lake.



After positioning her comfy footstool, she started to make a circular cut in the ice. Suddenly--from the sky--a voice boomed, "THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!"



Startled, the blonde moved further down the ice, poured a
A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money, decided to hire herself out as a "handy-woman" and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood.



She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do. "Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch," he said. How much will you charge me?" The blonde quickly responded, "How about $50?"

The difference between a redhead and a blonde: A redhead is a blonde from hell.



The difference betweena blonde and a redhead: A blonde is a redhead with all the fire burned out of her.
A blonde was walking down the road with a healthy looking pig under her arm. As she passed the bus stop,someone asked,



"Where did you get that?"



The pig replied,



"I won her in a raffle!"
A blonde and a redhead went to the bar after work for a drink,and sat on stools watching the 6 O'clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge,and the blonde bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn't jump.



Sure enough,he jumped,so the blonde gave the redhead $50. The redhead said,



"I can't take this,you're my friend."



But the blonde insisted saying,



"No. A bet's
Question: If a blonde and a brunette fell off a building,who would hit the ground first? Answer: The brunette - the blonde would have to stop for directions!
What did the blonde say when she knocked over the priceless Ming vase? 'It's ok Daddy, I'm not hurt.'