Classic Jokes

Best Classic Jokes on the internet. An ever-growing collection of extremely funny jokes.

A Dark Joke

When I was a kid, I made a really big sandcastle with my grandma.

Unfortunately, that didn’t impress anyone at the cremation…

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Two Blind Pilots Enter A Plane.

They have sunglasses and white sticks.

As the plane starts to move, the passengers are uncomfortable. The plane gains speed, but it stays on the ground. The remaining runway gets smaller and smaller, and the plane is rushing towards a fence.

A Man Goes On A Trip

A man goes on a trip to Israel with his wife and his mother-in-law. His mother-in-law died at the hotel. The administration there told him, that they can organize her funeral there for free, as she died there, but to take her body to the US will cost 5,000 dollars.

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A Joke About A Politician

A politician visited a village after a storm. He met there with the leadership of the village and asked what their needs were.

“We have just two needs, sir,” replied the head of the village. “First, we have a hospital, but there’s no doctor.”

There Was A Bad Car Accident

There was a bad car accident. Both cars were totally destroyed, but no one was hurt. The drivers crawled out of their cars, one said, “Oh, it seems you are all right. This must be a miracle.”

Two Beggars

Two beggars are begging in different areas of London …

One begs just as long as the second, but only collects two or three pounds a day.

A Woman Has Twins

A woman had twins and gave them up for adoption.

One of them to a family in Greece and the other to a family in Spain. The first one was named Alexander and the second one Matías.