It’s A Miracle
The devout man lost his Bible while he was mending fences out on the range.
A few weeks later, a dog walked up to him carrying the Bible in its mouth.
Luxurious Perfumes
An old lady got on an elevator in a luxurious building when a young woman gets on smelling of perfume. The woman turns to the old lady and says,
“CLIVE CHRISTIAN NO. 1 USD 2150 per ounce!”
A Pet
A drunk man brings a sheep home, tells his wife it’s a pet. She asks,
“Where are you going to keep it?”
A Small Fly
A small fly asks his mother,
“Mom, can I go to the circus?”
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A Mexican, A Black, and a Redneck Men
There was a Mexican, a black, and a redneck were walking along. When at the same time they all see a lamp sitting on a table and run-up to it. A genie pops up and says,
“Each of you gets one wish.”
Straight To Hell
A drunken man crawls out of a bar and, gets on a bus late one night, and sits by an elderly woman. She stares at the man and says,
“I have some news for you. You’re going straight to hell!”
Three Mice
Three mice were sitting and talking about how tough they were. The first mouse slams a shot of rum and says,
“I play with mouse traps for fun. I run into it and as it is closing on me, I grab the bar and start working out my musculs.”
No thank you
This man goes into a bar and notices a hottie blond, always alone, who is a regular customer there.
After a few days, he approached this blond lady. Every time he suggested her something, the answer was the same,
SUPPORT=FUNNY
A Young Boy
A policeman caught a young boy with a gun and a fox in his hands.
“Hey, listen to me,” said the policeman, “Whatever you do to that poor creature, I shall do the same to you”
The Drunken Wino
The drunken wino was stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in the gutter. A cop pulled up and said,
“I’ve got to take you in, sir. You’re obviously drunk”
A Dark Humor
The nurse hands a man his newborn and says, “I’m sorry, but your wife didn’t make it.”
He responds, “Well give me the one my wife made.”
An Avid Golfer
There was this preacher who was an avid golfer. Every chance he could get, he could be found on the golf course swinging away. It was an obsession.
One Sunday was a picture-perfect day for golfing. The preacher was in a quandary as to what to do, and shortly, the urge to play golf overcame him. He called an assistant to tell him that he was sick and could not do church, packed the car up, and drove three hours to a golf course where no one would recognize him. Happily, he began to play the course.
Keep Calm
A man was walking with his grandson in the supermarket. The boy was yelling all the time, telling he wants this candy, that juice, a bubble gum… He was running through the market like crazy.
Taste The Food
A woman called the waiter to taste the soup that was served to her.
The waiter spoke frightened,
“Ma’am, we are not allowed to taste the food.”
For A Parking Spot
An atheist goes to a shopping mall.
And there is no parking spot, so he says “God, if you give me a parking spot, I will convert myself and become Christian”.
SUPPORT=FUNNY
And So The Man Was Naked
After a long night of drinking for a woman, this man took advantage by giving her a ride home.
After the walk to the door, the woman asked him in for a nightcap. One thing led to another and so the man was naked.
