A burglar breaks into a home and holds the husband and wife hostage. At gunpoint, he forces the two to sit on chairs facing away from each other and ties them to the chairs. The burglar slowly and methodically begins stealing from the house.

When the burglar has taken everything of value and is ready to leave, the homeowners are still bound to their chairs. Suddenly, the man yells at the burglar, “Please untie her, please, let her go!”

The thief responds, “No, I’m not untying either of you so that the authorities get notified as late as possible. Don’t worry, your neighbors will soon wonder why your lights are still on throughout the night and check in on you long before you succumb to dehydration.”

The man pleads once again, saying, “Please, just untie her, I’ll do anything!”

The burglar once again explains his reasoning, “I need to get away with this crime. I’m sorry, I can’t leave anything up to chance.”

The man shuffles his chair towards the burglar, in a state of mania, and exclaims, “I’m begging you, man, just let her go. She won’t call the cops, I promise!”

The burglar, still unwilling to budge, finds it quite touching how much his hostage cares about his wife. “Wow,” he says, “You must really love your wife to beg me to untie her so desperately.”

“No,” the man replies in a state of frenzy, “My wife will be home in 15 minutes.”